February 2012
3 posts
An Actual Conversation with My Girlfriend About a...
Ethan: Wow. I just had the craziest dream ever.
Girlfriend: What was it?
Ethan: I dreamt that you had a rats nest on your chest… Like, rats were creating a home on you. It was kind of funny, I was laughing.
Girlfriend: (glares at Ethan) You were laughing? I’m mad at you.
Ethan: You’re…mad at me?
Girlfriend: Yeah, that’s f*cked up! Why would you laugh at...
3 tags
An Actual Conversation with A Senior Citizen in...
Senior Citizen: My granddaughter showed me the most amazing thing today.
Ethan: What’s that?
Senior Citizen: When you’re on hold with an operator, you can use the “speaker phone.” That way, you don’t have to keep the phone up to your face!
Ethan: (long pause) You’re just discovering this?
Senior Citizen: I’m old.
3 tags
An Actual Conversation with a TSA Officer at...
TSA Officer: Step through, please.
Ethan: (walks through metal detector)
TSA Officer: Hold it. Please go through once more.
Ethan: (turns around, walks through again)
TSA Officer: Again, please.
Ethan: Is something wrong?
TSA Officer: Just once more, please.
Ethan: But the machine never beeped…
TSA Officer: Please step through again.
Ethan: (walks through a third time,...
