Dave and Ethan |

An Actual Conversation While Driving to a Dave and Ethan Show in Syracuse, NY

Dave: Man, you’re a terrible driver.

Ethan: Look, we both have complimentary strengths and weaknesses. That’s what makes us a good team.

Dave: Right, we’re like Apple: I’m Steve Jobs, and you’re the fat guy.

Dave: You’ve been slacking with Actual Conversation.

Ethan: I’ve just been busy.

Dave: Let me help you!

Ethan: No.

Dave: Come on, I’ll get this one started.

Ethan: I don’t need—

Dave: Wow, the weather is so nice today. You would never know there was a hurricane this weekend…

Ethan: (long pause) …Yup.

Dave: PASTA!

Ethan: (sigh)

Dave: Did I make it?

B & B Owner: Good evening, gentlemen. What name is the reservation under?

Ethan: It should be under “Dave and Ethan.”

B & B Owner: …Oh. Alright…great. (pause) And…will you be needing two beds, or…are…you together…?

(quickly, both at the same time:)

Ethan: Two beds.

Dave: Together.

Girl: Hey, good show tonight.

Ethan: Oh, thank you.

Girl: Yeah.

(long pause)

Girl: So, are you guys faggots?

D+E